The PanMan Gazette
Sold : 4,008,001 - - - - - - - - Date : 1st June 1997 - - - - - - - - Price : 20 Net Dollars

The Top Ten list of what MIR stands for

10-Madly Into Roulette
9 - Men In Red
8 - Mispell Important Replys
7 - Mars Is Reachable
6 - Made Intel Rich
5 - Meteors Impact Regularly
4 - Manouvers In Reverse
3 - Might Indeed Rust
2 - Mostly In Repair
1 - Made In Russia
Mr.Blobby dies in Horrific Accident!

The late Mr.Blobby will no longer be broadcasting on our television sets as he is now Dead. Last night while driving home in his Blobby Mobile running on Un-Blobbied Blobby Fuel travelling on the M-Blobby, he had an Accident. The accident occured 10 BlobbyMiles outside BlobbyLand and 20 BlobbyMiles from BlobbysVille. He died when his Blobby Mobile hit a Blobby Bird, this sent Mr.Blobby out of control where he hit the Blobby Barrier and rolled down Blobby Hill. Mr.Blobby came to a stop when his Blobby Mobile hit a Blobby Tree.
.......Blobby Witnesses at the scene of the accident were in Blobby Shock!. Mrs. Blobby is too Blobby Upset to talk to our Blobby Reporters, however, a local Blobby, a Mr. Charles Blobber, the Blobby Owner of the Blobby Green Grocers, said... "Yes, it was Blobby Terrible!".

So there you have it folks. We will miss you Mr.Blobby! We will miss your Blobby Blobs on your Blobby Skin and we will meet again some sunny Blobby Day!
New Sport sends Unknown country top of Media

Ever heard the Isle of Smeg? Didnt think so...neither had the worlds top geologist until one day while on a trip to Easter Island, a Dr B Dover PHD lost his bearings and ended up on an island previosly unknown to we know it...
What Dr Dover found was what looked to be a tribe of people with extremely ovesized heads! He couldn't believe his eyes. Upon further investigation, he found out that their main hobby which appears to be a ritual as well as a sport what what they refered to as "Smeg Ball" (Named after the Island of course) Which involved pairs of Male tribesmen repeatedly Smashing the Hell out of the the other persons Head!! With what could only be described as a Baseball Bat with Studs in it!!!!
"How this civilisation have survived with this activity going on each day is beyond me!"- Stated Dr Dover upon being interviewed by our press. This Sport has now caught on in the USA and parts of ASIA...The Health authority is stepping up its action in its attempts at banning this Sport saying that it is Dangerous...but Newcomers to the game say that it is perefectly safe and that they even find it Relaxing!